The Importance of Putting Family First This Christmas

The importance of a strong family bond is something that doesn't get recognized nearly as much as it should. In fact, there is so little emphasis on family in our modern world that many people will spend Christmas alone this year. If you don't want this to become the reality for your family, it's up to you, as the father, husband, and leader to have a "family-first" emphasis this Christmas.

The Fall of the Modern Family

For millions of Americans, Christmas is marked by family time, games, and merriment. However, that isn't the case for many others. According to the APA (American Psychological Association), between 40% and 50% of marriages end in divorce or separation.

As a result, millions of men and women will be spending this Christmas season without their significant others. Worse still, more than 18 million children will spend Christmas without a father in the house, as 1 in 4 American children grow up without their paternal father.

In what was once the most family-first country in the world, these numbers are worsening each year and are a clear indicator that something has to change. As a father and husband, you can either help lead that change or contribute the problem.

Why Should Family Relationships Always Come First?

Family Members Form a Strong Social Connection

The most obvious reason that family is important is because of the social connection it provides. After all, it's tough to have a merry Christmas when you're spending it alone. I find this to be particularly true in my own life, especially as I'm getting older.

While I still have some close friends that I see occasionally, my best friends are my siblings, parents, and in-laws. As a result, if I didn't have close bonds with my family members, I would be mostly alone in life. This idea really catches up to me when the holidays roll around and I start feeling nostalgic.

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"Family First" Means Every Family Member

The importance of family extends to all family members, and not just your spouse and children. Having healthy relationships with your entire family, including siblings, parents, aunts, and uncles is nearly as important as being a good father and husband.

In fact, it's difficult to be a good husband and father if you don't get along with your parents, siblings, or grandparents. You often need them as sources of advice and information, and strained relationships with them can often lead to strained relationships within your own family.

Your Kids Need a Dad

Even if you don't think family is an important thing for your personal growth, it's essential for your kids. According to the Children's Bureau, here are some staggering facts and statistics about children who grow up with absent fathers.

●     85% of youths who are in prison or juvenile detention facilities have an absent father.

●     71% of kids who drop out of high school don't have a father in the household.

●     Children with present fathers are over 40% more likely to get A's in school.

●     Children with absent fathers are more prone to homelessness, abuse, poverty, emotional problems, and developmental problems.

So, despite how you might feel about family and community in your personal life, your kids need a strong paternal presence.

We All Need Help Sometimes

Even if you are successful right now, and your life is going exactly according to plan, you never know when you might need help. Whether it's encouragement, financial assistance, a safe place to stay, or if you were in a car accident in the middle of the night, family is always there when you need them most.

I have lost count of how often my parents and in-laws have helped my wife and me out in the midst of crisis. Because of their example, I can't wait to do the same thing for my kids when they're old enough to get themselves into jams.

Mutual Betterment

As a parent, it's easy to feel like the relationship between you and your children is one-sided. In other words, you're always helping them out, teaching them about life, and offering them moral support without it appearing you get anything in return.

However, parenting is about as one-sided as a coin. While it's certainly your job to help your wife and kids be their best selves, this is a highly rewarding experience where they also help you be your best self. Whether they know it or not, every time you sacrifice your time, money, or talents on their behalf, they're making you a better person.

Family First This Christmas

Finally, while family should come first year-round, it's a particular priority at Christmas for men of faith who want to teach Christian traditions and beliefs to their children. After all, Christmas is a holiday in remembrance of how God gave his only child, Jesus, as a gift to humanity to be raised by a loving family.

While the story of Christ's birth enabling our salvation is essential, I think it's important that we don't forget about the second aspect of the Christmas story - that God entrusted Jesus to be raised in a FAMILY. Jesus had a mom, dad, siblings, and grandparents, all of whom helped Him shape the man He would one day become.

As such, if you're only going to take one thing from this article, it's that I believe that God sent Jesus to Mary and Joseph as an example of what He wanted families to be. Cohesive, tight units filled with love and encouragement, always striving for the betterment of each other.

Final Thoughts

To be clear, spending quality time and moments with your family isn't just important during the holiday season - it's a year-round necessity. After all, you can't expect to be absent from the lives of your wife and kids for most of the year and then have everyone come together on Christmas like nothing's wrong.

There's also no sense in spending time with your loved ones this Christmas if it's only for "old time's sake." Instead, you should want to spend time together, making memories that will last a lifetime. However, that will only happen if you emphasize the importance of family year-round, and not just on December 25.

What are some of the ways you spend time with your family during the holidays? What advise do you have for young fathers to help them keep a "family-first" emphasis?